I posted a great quote of the day this week -- "If you experience stress, you're doing it wrong." (Jay Conrad Levinson) A friend of mine thanked me for reminding her of this concept, and it made me think about how complicated our lives become without us even realizing it. So let me take a second today to remind you to K.I.S.S.
Asking The Big Questions
In everything that you do throughout the next 24 hours, take a second to ask yourself "why." For example, as I was organizing one of my clients on Monday, I caught her folding up each piece of mail she had opened and putting it back in the ripped envelope, before then placing the envelope in her action files. Not only was her to-do stack was twice as thick as it needed to be, but she had added three steps to her process -- re-stuffing the envelope, having to empty it again when it was time to tackle the to-do, and throwing the envelope away. When I asked "why?" my client stared at me with a blank look. The response was, "I don't really know." I pointed out that she could save time and effort if she tossed the envelope immediately, and kept only the important part. I watched the lightbulb go on over her head as she said, "You know, you're right!" My client is not stupid, she had just gotten into a habit, doing things the same old way every time, without questioning whether or not that way made sense.
We have so much to accomplish and stay on top of these days that we often run on autopilot, engaging in behaviors without recognizing the purpose behind them. But the key to REALLY simplifying your life is awareness. You have make conscious decisions about what you will do (and not do) -- otherwise, you're sure to get off track and find yourself wasting precious energy on activities don't actually do anything to improve your quality of life. Do you find yourself flipping channels, completely zoned out, not even paying attention to what's on TV, when you could be engaged in a more rewarding pursuit? Shuffling the same pile of magazines around your office month after month without ever actually reading them? Stashing more and more boxes of junk in an expensive storage unit, rather than cleaning out the stuff you don't use? Running out at the last minute for a missing dinner ingredient because you didn't plan ahead? Picking up after your kids when you could put that energy into teaching them to be responsible for themselves? Why?
What Benefit Do You Get?
If you can't identify a specific benefit you get from that behavior, it's quite possible it isn't serving any purpose in your life. For example, if I ask why you brush your teeth every morning, you will respond by saying, "so I don't get cavities" -- good! But if I ask why you clip coupons that you never remember to take with you when you go shopping (that subsequently expire and have to be thrown away 2 months later) -- and you tell me, "I might use them someday," that just doesn't cut it. You're not getting any value from the time and energy invested NOW, so you have two choices -- either stop that activity and put your resources into something more meaningful, or change your habits so that you DO get some form of payoff. It's really that simple.
So in this example, you could set up an expandable wallet with individual sections for the different types of coupons you collect (groceries, household items, personal items, eating out, car care, whatever). After clipping, you could file them in this wallet and stick it in your purse or car so you always have it with you. When you plan your weekly shopping day, you could go through the wallet as you write up your list, pulling out those coupons that you know you will use. Then each week, you could also toss out those coupons you ended up not needing. In an ideal world, you would never forget to use a coupon again, and you would save at least a little money at the store. But it sounds like a lot of work to me. Is all that effort really worth the $5.86 you will save? Perhaps, after looking at the time investment versus the payoff, you'll might determine (like I have) that coupons simply encourage you to buy a lot of stuff you don't need (just to get the discount) and give up on the whole activity altogether. Or you may find that you pocket an extra $150 every week and systematizing your clippage is the best decision you ever made. The point is, it will be a conscious choice, based on your values and goals.
Is There An Easier Way?
Finally, ask yourself if there isn't an easier way to accomplish the task that you're performing. Do you really need to spend a half an hour in the morning arranging 27 decorative pillows on your bed, or would simply smoothing the comforter be good enough for the room to feel "tidy?" Then let 'em go! Does it take you 12 tries to get out the front door, because you always forget your keys? Then hang a hook by the door so your keys have a home from the moment you walk in -- and they are always right where you expect them to be. Why run a different errand every day (dry cleaning, returns, the library, getting that picture framed) when piling all of your to-do's into a "going out the door" basket and making one trip a week (an organized, geographically-planned trip, complete with directions and confirmation of the store hours) would be much less time-consuming? And why do you keep throwing away the same solicitations and catalogs over and over again, when one phone call would get you off of their mailing list?
I'll end with another favorite quote of mine from "The Mosquito Coast" -- "For Father there were no burdens that couldn't be fitted with a set of wheels or runners or a system of pulleys." That's sort of how I feel about simplifying your life. There is no challenge so overwhelming, no time-waster so ominous, no frustration so severe that you can't find a solution. Of course, the solution may involve setting up a simple system, or it may require you to rewire your brain and rethink your lifestyle -- but it's always worth it in the long-run!
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