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Blog: The Pile High Club--how NOT to become a member
 A Lesson From My Dog About Possessions
This past Friday I had to put down my 14-year-old dog. She was my first baby. She was in my life before my husband and my kids. She was my BFF. It has been a rough few days, to say the least.
I deal with death a lot in my job, as people often call me in to purge Grandma's home after she is gone, or to sort through a parent's personal affects after they have passed (because it is too emotional or depressing to be handled by the family). Sorting through the belongings of the deceased is a wonderful lesson in value. What one person deems invaluable—something they could never part with—another may deem… dumpster-worthy. I try to impart this lesson to my living clients who are reluctant to let go of items for which they do not have the space.
Let this sink in: When you are gone, what do you think your relatives (or the person—like me—who your relatives hire to go through your things) will do with that "valuable" but bulky ceramic duck collection you just can't part with?
Anyway, this past weekend, after I came home from the vet, I walked through the house and picked up the pieces of my dog's life so I could purge them. The dog bed, the dog meds, the food bowls, the radial collar, the toys, the nail clipper, and the leash and collar. That was it. Those were the only items I had to make decisions about—and I was so glad. They were easy decisions. I kept the leash and food bowls for when I am ready to get another dog, and kept her collar for sentimentality. Everything else was trash.
I don't know why, but getting those things out of the house was closure for me and I was glad it was not a long, arduous, emotional, multi-day process like I have been a part of many times in my organizing career. Not spending time making decisions about a million different items allowed me to immediately start my grieving process, and thus, my healing process.
There is a lovely essay written by Nobel Prize-winning playwright Eugene O'Neill. It is written in the voice of his dalmation as the dog's the last will and testament. You should really read the whole essay—it is short and touching if you've ever had a pet. http://www.eoneill.com/texts/blemie/contents.htm
The section that spoke most to me, however, is this (imagine this is a dog talking):
I have little in the way of material things to leave. Dogs are wiser than men. They do not set great store upon things. They do not waste their days hoarding property. They do not ruin their sleep worrying about how to keep the objects they have, and to obtain the objects they have not. There is nothing of value I have to bequeath except my love and my faith.
What a great lesson, and one that could have been written by my dog. At the end of it all, none of the stuff really matters, of course. When your days are over, the only things that really have value are the memories and the love that comes from sharing them with others.
posted on: 2/22/2010 10:30:00 AM by Heather Lambie
category: Paper
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The Pile High Club--how NOT to become a member
by Heather Lambie
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About Heather:
My Husband - "Honey, how thin can you spread yourself before you're no longer there?" Me - "I don't know. But I'm in it to win it, so we may have to find out."
Heather's Website:
www.yourhomeeditor.com
Favorite Websites
- The Sartorialist
This site appeases my hunger for all things New York, reminds me of my time there, and gives me great ideas for unconventional looks.
- Toffee To Go
They are located in Tampa, very near me, but they deliver/ship nationally. They have THE BEST toffee EVER. It's buttery, salty, sweet--all my favorite things in one bite.
- The Container Store
I know this is a no-brainer for an organizer...but this place really turns me on!
- The Poetry Foundation
- Because I Said So (blog)
As a mom myself, this mom of 6 (!!!) has me in stitches.
- Michael Buble
If I wasn't happily married, I might be stalking him. Bar none, the best voice and best sense of humor!
Quotes That Move Me
- General H. Norman Schwarzkopf
"The truth of the matter is, you always know the right thing to do. The hard part is doing it."
- Ivern Ball
"Most of us ask for advice when we know the answer but we want a different one."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The secret of education is respecting the pupil."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
"Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen."
- Abigail Van Buren
"The best index to a person's character is how he treats another person who can't do him good, and how he treats people who can't fight back."
- Dorothy Galyean
"Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere."
- Aristotle
"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it."
- Mark Twain
"To be satisfied with what one has; that is wealth. As long as one sorely needs a certain additional amount, that man isn't rich."
- Jackie Kennedy
"If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do matters very much."
Places I'm Dying to Visit
- Hawaii
Any how, any way, any time.
- Los Cabos, Mexico
- China
- Japan
- Alaska (via cruise ship)
- Marbella, Spain
Places I've Already Been
- Australia (Sydney)
- New Zealand
- Tahiti, Moorea, Bora Bora
- London
- Paris
Spent only one day here (took the Chunnel from London when I was there) but it was one amazing, beautiful day where I walked the flea markets, visited the Louvre, people-watched and used all 6 senses to experience it.
- Trinidad & Tobago
My husband is from here, so we go several times a year to visit family.
- Italy (Milan, Vicenza)
- Jamaica
Things I'd Like To Do Before I Die
- Run a leg with the Olympic torch before the games begin
- See the monarch butterflies migrate to Mexico
- Ride a horse on the beach (in the water)
- See a prize fight (boxing) in Las Vegas
- Run the NYC Marathon
I ran the Disney Marathon in 2000 (pre-kids). Would love to run another post-kids, to prove I can.
- Have washboard abs.
- Eliminate self doubt.
- Own an apartment in Manhattan.
- Watch the ball drop in Times Square on New Year's Eve.
- Take an RV trip down the coast of California.
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