Blog: It's good to be back!
Just A Housewife?
Recently my youngest started Kindergarten and I was a little lost for a week or two. Bayne and I made a plan 5 yrs ago and we had arrived at the doorstep of our goal's front door. We made it! In 2005 I made a decision to walk away from a high stress job for a demanding corporation. I existed for as long as I could in that environment until I could take no more of it. The abuse that goes on sometimes in cubbie hell is astonishing. I remember being in the ladies room one morning pregnant with my first son, Baylor, whom I suffered morning sickness the whole time. I had a manager come in and tell me to get back out on the floor making calls. I never let that resentment go, it literally felt like she punched me in the stomach. But the reason I worked were always for the people I worked with. I enjoyed the sense of community. I just saw a window, it was open…so I took it! I wanted to be home with my kids and I wanted a year off from trying to figure out what I was going to be.
Fast forward 5 years I've raised my toddlers, become an entrepreneur, dedicated my life to Christ, become an Interior Decorator and a Professional Home Organizer, spoken at numerous functions, made it to TV a couple of times, got to do a lot for charity and met some interesting people who've molded me as a whole person.
Throw in those little revelations I had over the summer, the threat of breast cancer is not nearly as scary as loose cannons so all in all it was an informative season. While truly feeling the temptation to quit it all, to walk away even removing the Lula signs from the truck I just kept thinking to myself…What would Lula do?
Would she quit and let defeat leave its mark, would I GO BACK to work? So I got kicked in the gut a couple of times…I'm no different than 10 other housewives I know going through the very same transformations. We are thirty-something housewives, college degreed, and feeling frowned upon for electing to be housewives. We feel we must prove to everyone that we are not lazy, soap opera watching bon- bon eaters!
It felt good to be home with Owen when he was a baby. Totally different than Baylor, who because of mom and dad's jobs had to be full timed daycared and became familiar with institutionalized child care at 6 weeks of age. He was a Babywise Baby, thus today he is very organized and a little obsessive about where items belong. Great student, excellent handwriting and eager to learn. However, has a bit of a temper and incredibly stubborn. Could it be because Mom and Dad were stressed over work ALL the time? Owen was allowed free rein, we did what we wanted when we wanted. Baylor came home shortly after I did and we were all together until 4K. Owen has his fits too but it an incredibly laid back child. So much his teacher has written several times he needs to speed up a little. We joke that Owen is on his own time clock. But now they are at school 5 days a week. This having NOONE all day long has been a bit of a bother for me. Not sure how to structure myself.
It has had me thinking…what did Betty Jean do all day? My sister recently commented on Facebook to me that she thought our Mother was possibly a secret spy, driving in the garage in her Maverick just in the nick of time to make it look like she'd been home all day. We never had to clean though, I don't remember EVER having to help with chores. She spoiled us!
But she was the quintessential housewife! So was grandmother Lula, and most of the women in my family. I get lectures constantly from my Mother about how much I do, but I never want to be accused of being lazy. I work hard and I'm proud of what I can do. So, why can't I be satisfied just being a housewife? And apparently I'm not the only one, because researching for this blog I found tons of women asking the same thing!! I do know that everything I have experienced in my history has led me to this point, I am to do something great with this…but alas, there's that fork again we talked about a few weeks ago. But just being afraid to call myself a housewife has at times almost gotten the best of me.
The one thing I do know, is that my kids need me now more than ever. With homework, tests, social studies projects and new routines they need my consistency and they definitely need a prepared mother. What I really enjoy is seeing ideas come to fruition. I enjoy encouraging others, I especially enjoy encouraging other women who are just getting their windows open.
I went with the girls to watch Eat, Pray, Love a few weeks ago and had one moment of losing it…when the elephant greets her in the garden. Ahhh! God speaks!! I get it because I am allowed to go out to a barn 3 times a week and witness God's creation in all it's morning glory. It got me to thinking about my own Eat Pray Love as Oprah had Julia lists during her interview. My Eat was Lula, My Pray was EASI and My love was my darling boys and husband. Yes, I'm a lucky housewife.
posted on: 9/2/2010 2:00:00 PM by Melissa Searcy
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Melissa Searcy is a professional organizer and independent decorator now living in Jasper, AL. Formerly of Montgomery, Melissa owns Lulagrace Interiors where she was a regularly featured guest on morning television and had articles featured in the local newspaper and many local monthly publications. For more information you may visit her at www.lulagrace.com. Melissa is also a member of the Facebook community at Facebook.com/melissa.searcy or on Twitter at Twitter.com/LulagracePO.
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