As a business success coach I have worked with many people who consider themselves successful and who are considered successful by their peers. But I've discovered that no matter how much you earn, who you are, or how much satisfaction your get from life, you can have a confidence CRISIS. Even those with high self-esteem and self-confidence can suffer from a confidence crash -- and it can completely derail all of your good INTENTIONS and positive plans, bringing your life to a grinding halt.
WHY IT HAPPENS
Sometimes, things happen that knock the confidence right out of us. At times, our confidence is already SHAKY as a result of a transition or loss or recent upset -- and a single incident like missing a deadline, getting a bad haircut, or spilling coffee on a document can send us storming out of the confidence cafe. When you crash, it is usually because your daily diet of life has not included enough confidence causing foods. Confidence is like Vitamin C. You need it in your DIET. Your body can only store it for a short time before it needs some more. You have to take responsibility for PLANNING your confidence meals and making sure you have large enough portions.
RECOVERING FROM A SETBACK
When you have a confidence crisis, don't despair, don't reach for the bottle of bourbon or the bon bons. Instead, start to use some of these confidence BOOSTING techniques. Begin with at least two, then add a third and a fourth. You will gain a lot more than confidence -- you will learn to love, honor, and APPRECIATE yourself more and more.
KEEP A JOURNAL
Keeping a journal is a great way to process and CLARIFY your feelings. Forcing yourself to write everyday also forces you to take time for daily reflection. Daily reflection can help you solidify what you know, what you have learned, and what you still need to pay attention to. It can also help you to recognize your STRENGTHS and focus less stringently on your weaknesses (a classic confidence drainer). Once you recognize how much potential you have, you will be a little easier on yourself when things don't go quite as planned, knowing that you can quickly get back on track.
Practice gratitude -- be THANKFUL for what you already have and put your attention on all the blessings you already possess. Keep a gratitude section in your journal. Everyday write down five things you are thankful for. This will help you feel richer and STRONGER in character, and that translates into confidence.
EVALUATE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
Assess the relationships in your life. Do they SUPPORT you or SABOTAGE you? All relationships change with time; some get better, some get worse. If you have relationships in your life that are more of a burden then a joy, it may be time to sever your ties -- or at least loosen the reins.
START NEW RELATIONSHIPS
Identify people that have the qualities you ADMIRE -- people you feel you could learn from and who could learn from you, as well. Look for people who can support you in your goals and efforts. Look for people who make you feel COMPETENT, accomplished, and special. Look for people you can have fun with. Boosting your confidence can be really fun, if you want it to be.
GET INTO A GOOD GROUP
This may be time for a traditional support group -- a clutter club or weight watchers or a group for parents. Chatting over a cup of carrot juice with your pals might be a remedy. And if you can't find anything that suits you, ORGANIZE your own group of confidence boosters and support each other in making positive life changes.
CHANGE YOUR BEHAVIOR
What do you do that BOOSTS your confidence and what do you do that brings it DOWN? Exercise, getting enough sleep, speaking your mind, and dressing well are behaviors that tend to boost confidence. Staying up late, spending all your time with Ben and Jerry, and saying "yes" too often to avoid confrontation when you really want to say "no" will bring your confidence down.
When we withhold communication because we are AFRAID of how we will be received, we chip away another bit of our confidence. Share your thoughts, opinions, and preferences. Speak up in all situations. The insignificant situations will be PRACTICE for the important occasions that are sure to follow.
TAKE A RISK A DAY
A risk is something you would do in an instant if you knew you would be SUCCESSFUL. It is the fact that you do not KNOW how it will turn out that makes it a risk. The best way to bolster your confidence is to start doing things you are afraid to do. Make a list of risks for you and start to do them one by one.
STICK WITH IT
Sometimes, it takes a few days to boost your confidence, sometimes, it takes a few weeks. Occasionally it can take a few months to overcome a confidence crisis. Know that if you are CONSISTENT with your confidence boosting techniques, you will eventually find yourself renewed, stronger, and more confident. Your new vitamin C will infuse your life with an new brighter, fresh and more POSITIVE outlook that will uplift your whole life.
Caterina Rondo, MA, MCC, wants you to have success with ease. She is an international success speaker, master coach and author of "Learn to Power Think". She helps people invigorate their personal lives and create the professional results they want. Visit her website at www.caterinar.com. You may contact Caterina at 800-966-3603 or at .
Would you like to reprint this article in your publication -- or distribute it to a wider audience? Click here for reprinting instructions.
Want to receive these kind of articles via e-mail each month? Sign up for a free newsletter subscription.
Click here to return to "Get Organized" -- February 2006...
www.OnlineOrganizing.com is a service mark of Bradford, LLC.
To see what people are saying about www.OnlineOrganizing.com, check out our visitor comments.