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     How To Create A Bond With Clients

Bonding is creating a close and VALUED relationship. An ongoing relationship. Lets look at a few dictionary definitions of relationship: 

According to the Merriam-Webster, it's the state or character of being RELATED to something else. The Random House calls it an emotional or other CONNECTION between people. The Oxford says it's the state of being related. I say it's all that goes on between people, once they have connected.

We're going to look at your relationships with decision-makers who can buy your services or products. But we must first recognize your most important relationship -- your relationship with YOU. You're the best you there is. There will never be another you. And you've got this one-way ticket-to life. You've got your shot at making a DIFFERENCE. And the better you relate with your prospects and customers, the more of a difference you can make.

So your first accountability is to yourself. You are accountable for offering the very FINEST products and services appropriate for your market and available to you. For continuing to stretch and grow as a person. For being accountable for your presence here. To help this happen, regard yourself as a work of art in process -- as a living human treasure. Be sensitive to the attitude of the decision-maker. Ask yourself if this transaction feels like a FIT, feels like it's right for your client and for you. Do you feel good about yourself; is your conscience clear after this transaction?

Instead of pitching your products and services, analyze the possibilities for a mutual exchange of values. Look for the chance of long-term SYNERGY rather than a one-time sale. For in-depth connection. For relationship. At the very least you want to know there will be referrals and recommendations flowering from this agreement or this sale. You want this to be the BEGINNING and not the end.

You're accountable for your COMFORT LEVEL relating with this decision-maker. Choose to offer only the services and products that feel right to you. Take into account this person and their needs, their situation and responsibilities. Plus possible end-users and all others affected by what you propose.

Put the cherry on the top: Go the extra mile. It feels so g-o-o-o-d. Include something EXTRA. Always -- every single time. Something not expected. Something NOT REQUIRED. Something above and beyond. A surprise that delights the decision-maker. 

When I was 7 or 8, there were 4 little ice cream parlors within a few blocks of my home in Ventnor, New Jersey. I'd cadge a nickel from my mom -- then I'd check out each store to see where I got the BEST DEAL for my five cents. The ice cream cones were all about the same size. However, at one of the stores the person behind the counter would dip the ice cream cone into a bowl of jimmies (little chocolate sprinkles) and then hand me the ice cream cone. Which ice cream parlor do you think got ALL my business?

  • Accept this truth -- decision-maker is already doing her best. There may be imposed policies she can't change. Maybe there are ritualized procedures she must abide by to keep her job. Go along. Be detached about it.

  • Do not invest emotion in outcomes. Be UNCONCERNED about whether or not you get a specific sale or client.

  • Offer your services at a fair fee. Have a "take it or leave it" attitude. No one  transaction matters.

  • Have resolute, impeccable, untouchable INTEGRITY. It's not enough to simply do what you say you'll do. More than that, be predictable and reliable in every way  relative to your word.

  • Include a bit of fun. Light-hearted, with good-will and tongue-in-cheek. Be a little off-the-wall when possible. Be sure there's ELATION in your relationship.

  • Say "Thank you." Express appreciation and gratitude as often as possible. With the decision-maker. With everyone. People talk. Word gets back that you're nice. Decision-makers like to relate with nice people.

  • Remember: you create, promote, or allow EVERYTHING that happens in your relationship with the decision-maker -- and all others. 

Let the PLATINUM rule guide your every action. Do unto others as they would have you do unto them.


Burt Dubin, a 20 year veteran of the business of speaking, coaches and mentors speakers and wanna-be's world-wide. Burt works with people who want to be speakers and with speakers who want to be masters. Visit his web site at www.SpeakingBizSuccess.com. You may contact Burt at 928-753-7546 or .

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